sense of purpose
What if we could take a taste of the maybe, beyond what’s been known and been named?
2018 brought back the drive and the energy but especially my common mindset. It hit me like the reset button and even though saying it’s a new year doesn’t quite change anything, it does. It’s a new beginning for many, may it be mentally but everyone has to start new every now and then. Everybody deserves a new beginning, a brand new start. And so did I.
I left 2017 behind almost like it never happened, goals of the future pulling me a whole lot stronger than overcoming the past. It was just gone. And even though I had a hard time admitting to myself, there came a day when I was laying in my bed, Vicky snoozing in hers, and another heartbeat next to me, curled up after midnight, after one working evening that boosted all my inspiration and I was all hyped. I was sitting there thinking, dayum. I am, just fully, actually, senselessly, happy.
So long as the mind is split, life is perpetual conflict, tension, frustration, and disillusion. Suffering is piled on suffering, fear on fear, and boredom on boredom… But the undivided mind is free from this tension of trying always to stand outside oneself and to be elsewhere than here and now. Each moment is lived completely, and there is thus a sense of fulfillment and completeness.
When … you realize that you live in, that indeed you are this moment now, and no other, that apart from this there is no past and no future, you must relax and taste to the full, whether it be pleasure or pain. At once it becomes obvious why this universe exists, why conscious beings have been produced, why sensitive organs, why space, time, and change. The whole problem of justifying nature, of trying to make life mean something in terms of its future, disappears utterly. Obviously, it all exists for this moment. It is a dance, and when you are dancing you are not intent on getting somewhere… The meaning and purpose of dancing is the dance.
– Alan Watts
Just like over the night we turned from mermaids into hikers and loved it just the same. The sea is keeping our love deep down between the waves, silently, patiently waiting for dives of the sunburned skin (and messy, salty summer fur). Walking through the snow and sun-kissed peaks and appreciating life through each and every step.
All you have is time. When you have nothing else, you have time.
Take the time you need to catch your breath again, but don’t ever take it for granted. This reminds me of how we started hiking last year. To sum it up just literally, I did it for the view. I did it for that breathtaking view on the top that made me forget how deadly the climb was. And looking back now I transferred it to real life. Toughest of climbs usually have the most amazing landscapes. And sometimes, when you’re on the top you fall of a cliff like I did last year. It hurt like nothing else ever could in this world. And what was left? Time. Time, again. Time to process. Time, to heal.
Time has changed everything. Looking back now through the years, it almost brings me to tears. But it all has changed exactly for all we needed or who we needed, to be. Or somehow possibly will be, someday in some way.
Not everything, or everyone you lose is a loss.
When I look around and see people I’m standing among. It’s something else. Not everyone is this lucky. They’re beyond anything I’ve ever asked for.
Even on your darkest days,
you know that I will never change.
I will love you the same.
And the purpose of life is to live a life full of purpose. People are designed to strive for happiness. It all comes down to you. It might not be making a lot of sense in the beginning, but doing things you love day by day is making you the reachest you’ll ever be. The rest will follow before you realize. I believe so. I’ll let you know, some day.
Don’t have expectations for 2018. Have them for life. And kick your ass to raise up to them. Above them. And walk through each and every day like you own it. Because you do.
Do you, and do more of it.